  {"id":583,"date":"2025-09-18T14:52:08","date_gmt":"2025-09-18T18:52:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/?page_id=583"},"modified":"2025-11-14T10:26:07","modified_gmt":"2025-11-14T15:26:07","slug":"pavan","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/student-activities-opportunities\/pavan\/","title":{"rendered":"The Pavan"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/PAVAN-2025-compressed.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Pavan-2025-cover-image-246x248.png\" alt=\"image of the 2025 Pavan cover\" width=\"216\" height=\"218\" class=\" wp-image-606 alignleft\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Pavan-2025-cover-image-246x248.png 246w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Pavan-2025-cover-image-388x392.png 388w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Pavan-2025-cover-image-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Pavan-2025-cover-image-120x120.png 120w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Pavan-2025-cover-image.png 604w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 216px) 100vw, 216px\" \/>The Pavan Art and Literary Magazine of Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter&#8217;s<\/a><\/em>, created each year by students and faculty from the English and Art Departments, promotes the ideals of literature by providing students with a recognized means of expression. We welcome submissions of original poetry and prose, as well as visual art, from students, faculty, staff, and alumni of Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter\u2019s University.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/PAVAN-2025-compressed.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>Read the latest issue of <em>The Pavan<\/em><\/strong><\/a><br \/>\n<a href=\"https:\/\/repository.saintpeters.edu\/collections\/9w032300g?locale=en\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Check out past issues of <em>The Pavan<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<h2 id=\"mast\">Featured Work in <em>The Pavan<\/em> 2025<\/h2>\n<div id=\"accordions-609\" class=\"accordions-609 accordions\" data-accordions={&quot;lazyLoad&quot;:true,&quot;id&quot;:&quot;609&quot;,&quot;event&quot;:&quot;click&quot;,&quot;collapsible&quot;:&quot;true&quot;,&quot;heightStyle&quot;:&quot;content&quot;,&quot;animateStyle&quot;:&quot;swing&quot;,&quot;animateDelay&quot;:1000,&quot;navigation&quot;:true,&quot;active&quot;:999,&quot;expandedOther&quot;:&quot;no&quot;}>\r\n                <div id=\"accordions-lazy-609\" class=\"accordions-lazy\" accordionsId=\"609\">\r\n                    <\/div>\r\n\r\n    <div class=\"items\"  style=\"display:none\" >\r\n    \r\n            <div post_id=\"609\" itemcount=\"0\"  header_id=\"header-1759863777825\" id=\"header-1759863777825\" style=\"\" class=\"accordions-head head1759863777825 border-none\" toggle-text=\"\" main-text=\"&quot;Dance with Me&quot;  by Carmel Galasso \u201879\">\r\n                                    <span id=\"accordion-icons-1759863777825\" class=\"accordion-icons\">\r\n                        <span class=\"accordion-icon-active accordion-plus\"><i class=\"fas fa-chevron-up\"><\/i><\/span>\r\n                        <span class=\"accordion-icon-inactive accordion-minus\"><i class=\"fas fa-chevron-right\"><\/i><\/span>\r\n                    <\/span>\r\n                    <span id=\"header-text-1759863777825\" class=\"accordions-head-title\">\"Dance with Me\"  by Carmel Galasso \u201879<\/span>\r\n                            <\/div>\r\n            <div class=\"accordion-content content1759863777825 \">\r\n                <p>For a very long time, I wanted to participate in the Spiritual Exercises of Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVIgnatius of Loyola; however, I never found the time or considered options that would allow for this experience. As a single, independent working woman, how would I find time for this type of prayer? I could never take a month off for a silent retreat; this would almost become a luxury, one which I would put on a bucket list for a later time. Yet, there was a hunger to travel this Spiritual Journey.<\/p>\n<p>Through Campus Ministry at Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter\u2019s University there came an offer for the 19th Annotation of the Spiritual Exercises in Daily Life, which can be done by people who work full-time. In this version, the Exercises are extended over several months, and the retreatants do weekly prayer practices, readings, and meditations. When the opportunity was offered to me to participate in this Ignatius Retreat in daily life, I jumped to participate in the program. I am a busy person! This was a prayer for a busy person. A win-win!\u00a0 This would be an easy process, said I. I go to mass, I believe in God, I know the teachings of the church, I worked in Campus Ministry; how bad could this process be? Easy, I thought. I could do this.<\/p>\n<p>Once I began the Spiritual Exercises, I had no idea what was before me. As the process began, my spiritual director (a priest) was easy to talk with. I looked forward to our weekly meetings in a sitting room in his residence, in which we discussed things and prayed together. However, some discipline is required to do your own daily prayer, reading, and meditation. I was spending about 45 minutes each day to prepare for our weekly meetings and to grow in the Spirit. I had to learn to keep myself open to God\u2019s love for me and to grow in a relationship with Jesus so different than I ever imagined. I prayed hard to understand God\u2019s love for me and how deeply that Love is. I had to come to understand the consolation and desolation, the encounter with the gentle angel that touches the soul lightly, \u201clike drops of water to a sponge,\u201d as well as the evil one who comes to bring agitation and insecurity. I met both on this journey towards and with Jesus. I tried to focus on Jesus, always trying to remember that He is meeting me where I am and as the disciples on the road to Emmaus who journey with the risen Christ, I tried to remain on that path. In my struggle, one question that would resurface in my prayer was, what was the force keeping me on the journey? Was the force within myself or was the force that Jesus wanted to truly share his life with me?<\/p>\n<p>About halfway through the daily retreat, there was a bit of a derailment with my process. My spiritual director and I could not continue the process together any longer. There were other priests who were mentors to me in the past, but I felt that their guidance at times had a negative impact on me; this priest felt that I was transferring the negativity from these past relationships onto him and he no longer thought that it would be fruitful for us to continue together on the journey\u2026. BAM! The moment of desolation. What to do? How to continue, should I continue? How do I push through my anger and not stay in this desolation? I felt sad and betrayed. What had I done for this to happen? What was lacking in the journey? Was I to give up? Was this a sign of not being worthy to continue in this relationship with Jesus? In the desolation had the evil one succeeded? What should I do? The process that I thought would be easy had become difficult and painful. As that old Peggy Lee song goes, \u201cIs that all there is?\u201d Was I done? Was Jesus done with me? Was I done with Jesus?<\/p>\n<p>In the search for answers to these questions, I was blessed to connect with a different spiritual director who guided me through the completion of the retreat in daily life. The second spiritual director was understanding, but rehashing the experience and not feeling worthy to continue the process was painful for me. However, I do not give up easily. What was the driving force? What was pulling at me to keep going? What helped through this time of desolation was to always reflect on Psalm 139: \u201cYou have searched for me, Lord, and you know me\u2026. Where can I go from your Spirit?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The Spiritual Exercises helped me to understand that, as with any relationship, there must be an ongoing desire to keep the relationship alive, to keep the communication open, to listen not only with ears but with the heart. I had to keep moving forward and know that the love Jesus has for me is greater than I could ever imagine, greater than anything I have experienced. No matter how many times I am distracted or derailed from the intended course of this relationship, I must push forward. It seemed that there was something unexplainable pulling in my heart to keep moving forward. Was the desire to have God\u2019s love in my life? It was the desire for the desire to keep me on the journey. Perhaps it was something more powerful than wild horses.<\/p>\n<p>I am a person who wants answers and outcomes quickly. Why is the prayer slow? Where are the answers? What I learned or encountered was the slow work of Jesus in this relationship. The Spiritual Exercises are a dance. The dance is sometimes a waltz, sometimes a tango, sometimes swing or sometimes freestyle, and Jesus is the dance partner. Jesus takes the lead and knows how to move, to guide me. When we dance, we become transformed by music and movements that show us what is yet to come. With Jesus as my dance partner, he catches my heart in the music and movement of life. The Spiritual Exercises take me on a journey which captures my very being, allowing me to re-engage my life with the one person who knows me better than I know myself.<\/p>\n<p>I continued to encounter so many wonderful experiences through the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius in daily life. With all their twists, rhythms, turns, and derailment in the process, Jesus kept me on my feet. Jesus kept me engaged in the dance. Jesus led me to God through the Spirit, which is forever at work within me. In my desolation, I wanted to give up, much like a dance marathon. I grew weary, but my partner believed in me and pushed me on. Yet in my heart, there was a stronger need to continue. The words of Zephaniah 3:17 rang through, \u201cThe Lord your God will take great delight in you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>In the delight of the dance, I felt Jesus\u2019 love for me.\u00a0 I learned of His mercy and forgiveness. I grew in gratitude for those who have been on the dance floor with me. I continue this dance with Jesus and I pray that the Spirit stays close and fills me with an awareness of how greatly I am loved and therefore the dance continues. When dancing with Jesus there is no limit to a specific style or tradition. Dancing with Jesus transcends movement and space.<\/p>\n<p>There is a harmony with the sacred presence; each step and each movement, each touch is filled with awe. No choreography is needed and the dance is intimate; at each sway, each turn, Jesus\u2019 hand on my back would convey love, a surrender, a closeness of heart. As the dance continues, I feel his hand guiding me, leading me to a dance of souls imagining the rhythm, passion, forgiveness, and unwavering love.<\/p>\n<p>After a rough beginning of the Spiritual Exercises, stepping on toes and falling, I am able to step forward. Jesus\u2019 arms encircle me, the weight of burdens lifted. The dance floor expands and I dance with the constellation as if it is the dance of love. It is dancing with perfect harmony, a tapestry of healing and hope.<\/p>\n<p>I am grateful Jesus led and guided me across the dance floor so that one day, the dance of love will continue in the grand ballroom of all. Are you willing to join in the dance, knowing that the movement can be challenging, that the rhythm, turns and spinning can cause confusion? The Spiritual Exercises embody what it is like to dance to the rhythm of the one who will always guide our steps on the dance floor. It is a celestial waltz\u2013a dance of souls.<\/p>\n            <\/div>\r\n    \r\n            <div post_id=\"609\" itemcount=\"1\"  header_id=\"header-1759863847413\" id=\"header-1759863847413\" style=\"\" class=\"accordions-head head1759863847413 border-none\" toggle-text=\"\" main-text=\"&quot;why i (almost) stopped creating&quot; by Gabriel Schlegel \u201825\">\r\n                                    <span id=\"accordion-icons-1759863847413\" class=\"accordion-icons\">\r\n                        <span class=\"accordion-icon-active accordion-plus\"><i class=\"fas fa-chevron-up\"><\/i><\/span>\r\n                        <span class=\"accordion-icon-inactive accordion-minus\"><i class=\"fas fa-chevron-right\"><\/i><\/span>\r\n                    <\/span>\r\n                    <span id=\"header-text-1759863847413\" class=\"accordions-head-title\">\"why i (almost) stopped creating\" by Gabriel Schlegel \u201825<\/span>\r\n                            <\/div>\r\n            <div class=\"accordion-content content1759863847413 \">\r\n                <p><em>The following is an edited version of a video script I wrote, adapted for reading. As many of those who submit to The Pavan are creatives, I figure submitting this would be right at home and would strike a chord with those who also contemplated putting an end to their artistic careers.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Hi there. I'm pretty sure you haven't heard about me up until this point. In fact, I'd imagine for a lot of you reading this essay, you probably haven\u2019t even seen me on campus. Maybe, if you\u2019re just coming to attend Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter\u2019s after the 2025 school year, you might not ever get to meet me, and I\u2019ll be among many of the other artists here whose voice has been immortalized by the editorial board of this year\u2019s edition of the magazine. But regardless of your relations with me, be they familiar or strange, I want to start this off by saying \u201cthank you.\u201d Thank you for giving this essay, this one <em>thought<\/em> of mine, a chance at being expressed. This one\u2019s going to seem very \u201cstream-of-consciousness\u201d-esque, but do your best to stay with me on this introspective journey from a fellow creative.<\/p>\n<p>I realize that, as time goes on, many of the mediums I talk about may fall to irrelevancy. Though I do hone my focus on the game <em>Geometry Dash<\/em> and my contributions to that particular community, it is not intended to be the <em>main<\/em> point of this piece. In fact, you can view it as an example of expression. With this in mind, even if you, as an artist, cannot connect with <em>this <\/em>specific medium, I do hope that the point I\u2019m attempting to get across by using it still connects. Art <em>is <\/em>universal, after all. In fact, the community-sharing aspect of art as a whole is the best way I can start this off. You see, when an artist creates something, they'll create it for a reason. Maybe it's just to vent off some steam or other frustrations from their life. Maybe they have some message they want to share, but have no idea <em>how<\/em> to share it. Art, in its rawest form, allows us to express these inexpressible ideas. It gives us the power to put whatever we're feeling in tangible form and allow others to feel it too, through their own interpretations. A prime example of this is a content creator on YouTube named Will Ryan, better known online as DAGames. There\u2019s a very good chance you might have heard some of his works \u2013 tracks such as \u201cBuild Our Machine\u201d (a song inspired by the game <em>Bendy and the Ink Machine<\/em>), \u201cBrothers in Arms\u201d (another inspired by the game <em>Cuphead)<\/em>, \u201cSlave To The Factory Line\u201d (also inspired by the game <em>Poppy\u2019s Playtime)<\/em>, and more practically had the younger generation in a chokehold from 2017 to the mid 2020s. But it\u2019s not these songs that I\u2019m focused on here, as much as I love and adore them to the point of memory permanence\u2013no. It's his personal, heartfelt songs that <em>really<\/em> drew my attention. One of the first albums he released on the DAGames channel, back in 2017, was <em>Heart Of An Artist.<\/em> It was a way for him to channel all of his emotions of sadness, his frustrations with art mediums as a whole, but most importantly, it was all a reflection of <em>him, <\/em>who <em>he<\/em> was as an artist.<\/p>\n<p>As I was getting into the swing of art, a lot of these emotional songs really got me to know how he felt inside, feelings that aren\u2019t so easily explainable when just talking about it. It's something that many fans, myself included, have commended him for, using his emotions and talents, in conjunction, to craft a huge fantasy world, complete with complex lore that all ties into the basic concepts of what it means to be an artist. Had I the time, I\u2019d love to gush about all of these stories, but really, explaining them doesn\u2019t do it justice. I\u2019ll have to implore you to look into the story of Goliath, the Iris, and the Dimetrix on your own time\u2013you most certainly won\u2019t regret it. All this being said, for me and many others, he serves as a great inspiration.<\/p>\n<p>But that\u2019s just focusing on <em>one<\/em> popular platform, in <em>one<\/em> medium. Why don\u2019t we bring it back to something smaller, yet just as comparable in scale, awe, and amazement? In the game <em>Geometry Dash<\/em>, players have access to a level editor. It does about everything you'd expect a level editor to do: you can place many objects and manipulate them in any way you see fit, from changing their size to changing their color. You can use more advanced features that the game uses in its own levels to build whatever you want. But the results of what can be <em>achieved<\/em> in this editor go <em>far<\/em> beyond the limitations that were set by the developer \u2013 actual games made <em>within<\/em> this game, programming languages made out of the game\u2019s own \u201ctriggers\u201d (invisible objects in the level that affect many things, such as when an object moves, the color of an object, etc.), levels comprised of so much beauty they're practically worthy of being put up in a museum or set as a computer desktop \u2013 everything and more, all spawned from a single community split between players and creators, coming together to form the entirety of the game. People have built amazing levels and challenges that continue to push the boundaries of what's humanly possible, but have also created many stories that have captured the hearts of many, some of which have left unforgettable experiences that are talked about fondly to this day. Simply describing it on paper does not do some of these creations justice; if you\u2019re interested, I highly implore you to search up some of the community\u2019s greatest builds on your own time.<\/p>\n<p>These levels have inspired me, in much the same way that Will Ryan's works have, and I aspired to create something that would have a similar effect on my own audience. So, for years, I sat, studying these levels, these works of <em>art<\/em>, to see how they do it, wondering all the while what story <em>I<\/em> could tell. <em>Who<\/em> would be my audience? Who would be my community?<\/p>\n<p><em>Community.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m sure you\u2019ve seen a trend already with the two examples I\u2019ve given: that being, the mention of communities which have surrounded a person or a topic. The thing that brings people together, the thing that allows an artist to <em>grow<\/em>, to be noticed, to feel\u2026 <em>accepted<\/em>. Much of what I\u2019m trying to get at here has a <em>lot<\/em> to do with these ideas. I saw what they had, what they were doing, and I resonated so much with what they did that <em>I<\/em> got inspired. I wanted to do what they did, share my story with people, be loved, and connect with others who were like me, and that\u2019s what kept me doing art for so long. And, believe it or not, I got that! I would share whatever artwork I would make with my friends on a regular basis, I would upload whatever crazy, wacky, amazingly cool stuff I\u2019d program, and I\u2019d play through and showcase my recently, carefully crafted level that I put a lot of time and effort into. In time, I made a whole Discord server, and invited people from all walks of life to come join in, to connect with others, and to serve as a sort of hub for those who also wanted to share their stuff with whoever. We were a tight-knit community, one that is still going on strong today, albeit a bit slower than in the olden days (or in a time frame more accurate for my age, since 2017). I\u2019ve met many friends and always kept them in the loop on the stuff I was working on. It wasn\u2019t much, but as long as I had those friends, that\u2019s all that mattered to me. That\u2019s all I wanted, and that\u2019s all I got. Over time, we grew to have a mutual feeling of love for one another, genuine interest in what we were working on, and genuine care for the people behind the screen. Art had brought us all together.<\/p>\n<p>So\u2026 why stop? Why stop creating when I had gotten <em>exactly<\/em> what I wanted?<\/p>\n<p>You see, the biggest danger of creating art for different communities is that, sooner or later, you\u2019re going to start wishing that the larger community itself would start to take notice. You\u2019re still grateful for all of your friends, and you still create for them, but sometimes, you feel like you start to bore them. You start thinking you\u2019re not as exciting to them anymore. And soon it quickly begins to feel like you\u2019re creating less for yourself and more for <em>them.<\/em> At least, that\u2019s what I started feeling. Even though I would root for my friends' successes, watching as they would go on to become established members of the communities that we were a part of, there was still a part of me that wondered, \u201cWhen will it be <em>my<\/em> turn? When will <em>I<\/em> get my time in the spotlight?\u201d And as the days would pass, it started becoming clearer and clearer that I would <em>not<\/em> be getting that time. And when I started to feel that, I started feeling like I had been cheated out of it. That no matter how much work I put into my next creation, it would simply fall short, destined to not be noticed by anyone. I tried a few things. I tried sharing my work with the community directly. I tried nudging people in the direction of my work, leaving a simple note that said, \u201cHey, come check this out!\u201d I made <em>The Compositorium,<\/em> my art account on Instagram, and I shared my work on my wall, both on <em>The Compositorium <\/em>and my own personal account. People <em>did<\/em> enjoy it, but my mind would keep playing the dangerous numbers game.<\/p>\n<p><em>Numbers.<\/em> The one thing they tell you not to look at when creating is the numbers. Example one: When you start out streaming content, they tell you to turn off the view count. Example two: When you post something online, don\u2019t look at the number of likes, retweets, shares, any of it. No matter what it is, you\u2019re advised not to look at the numbers. Because if you do, you\u2019re going to be disappointed. And at first, I was doing well without paying attention to who actually liked my work and who didn\u2019t. I had my own people liking it, and that was enough for me. But then I started to see the numbers go down. While all of my other creator friends were rising to practical stardom, I started to feel left behind, and I was confused. Why? Why was it that, no matter what I did, I wasn\u2019t getting the same amount of attention that my friends were getting, if I was doing the same thing? Was I really creating for no reason? Is everything that I put out <em>bad?<\/em> Does it even matter if I create anymore? It\u2019s why so many content creators out there\u2013be it on TikTok, YouTube, whatever\u2013are so scared to put something out there that doesn\u2019t conform to what their audience is used to seeing\u2013in other words, we\u2019re scared of low retention rates. You see, we artists <em>want<\/em> the attention, we want our voices to be heard. It\u2019s why we create, after all, to share an often-times vulnerable part of ourselves. But when they aren\u2019t heard, it makes some of us feel as though we\u2019re talking to a wall.<\/p>\n<p>Some of us, who haven\u2019t learned to not compare ourselves to others, start to lose motivation.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s a personal example: In the summer of 2022, there was \u201cArmaros,\u201d a<em> Geometry Dash<\/em> level, meant to be the hardest I had ever made up to that point, and also the best I\u2019d ever built. I\u2019ve made many levels for this game, and a lot more that I <em>haven\u2019t<\/em> finished and published were mainly canceled due to feeling like nobody would notice or play them. I would tell myself that nobody would like them. Yet even still, for five months, starting in May of 2022, I hyper-fixated on creating a level, doing my best to make something I was proud of. For once, I was enjoying the creation process. Once I finished it, I put it up, hoping that someone would notice, that <em>that<\/em> would be it, that would be what would bring me to my time in the spotlight. But then, once I came back to it, my mind started playing the numbers game again, and I was disappointed. Not many people had noticed it.<\/p>\n<p>In the summer of 2022, I decided to put my pen down. I was tired of it. Of everything. I deleted my art account, posted something on my story that said \u201cArt is dead,\u201d and went to sleep feeling terrible. I had given up on the one thing I was supposed to be passionate about, all because I felt like nobody would appreciate what I had to say. At this point, I only had one best friend who I would keep updating, but my brain would sometimes get me to think that they were just being nice, that they didn\u2019t really care about what I made and they just felt bad. The numbers game had been played, and I was on the losing end of it. I didn\u2019t want to create anymore. The ink in the creative well had run dry, and the tips of my sketching pencils matched my mood towards even thinking about sharing another project\u2013pointless.<\/p>\n<p>But, you\u2019ve seen the title of this piece. Had I stopped creating entirely, I would have just ended the paper here and left you with a cautionary tale of what happens when you attempt to appease others all the time. But some stories tend to leave a bit more of a happier ending than others\u2013not that I can call this \u201chappy,\u201d nor can I call it the ending. There was one fall semester here on campus where I was put into a creative writing class. For the second half of the semester, each and every single one of us had to submit a story for the class to workshop. Most of us would go twice, seeing how there were only ten of us. Another classmate and I had the pleasure of going a third time. And when I shared my first writing piece, interest had been garnered. People were asking me questions about the world I was making, the finer intricacies of each character and hierarchy I hadn\u2019t even put too much thought into. People were making theories all in that short time we had together, and when I shared the second half of my first writing, people were even more intrigued. By my third story, people were saying they were touched by my writing. It was an odd feeling, knowing that most of these people, some of whom I still see as friends, actually loved what I had to offer. Around the same time, I had restarted my lore-based Minecraft survival roleplay server, which had fallen victim to the art massacre I had incurred months prior, and the story that I had to tell was starting to catch people\u2019s attention. Further storylines branched out, and they\u2019re still going on, waiting to be finished to this day. Heads were turning, and more people were starting to like what I was doing. When I had killed my art account, a couple of my college friends were asking me why I had done it, showing remorse that I had given up on my art.<\/p>\n<p>And you know what <em>really<\/em> got me to stay in the creating scene? The two weeks I had spent hyper-fixating on making a custom level for a song I really loved and sharing it with the community. I indulged myself in the numbers game again, and this time, I was winning it. People were <em>really<\/em> starting to take notice. The numbers are still small, that much is true. But\u2026 for some reason, I\u2019m finding myself listening to this loud, vocal minority. The people that actually <em>did<\/em> notice me from day one, the people who have always been there by my side, watching me grow. My friends, who listen to me ramble about making new stuff with as much enthusiasm as I give them, actively helping me grow. And I couldn\u2019t be any more grateful for them than I already am. In a world where the writings I publish don\u2019t get traction, the levels I create don\u2019t get their widespread community recognition, and a world where a lot of the art I post goes widely unnoticed, there is still the small group of people that I didn\u2019t have before when starting out. People who always look forward to what I make next. People who are here for me.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m still learning how not to compare myself to others. It\u2019s only been recently that my self-esteem has been on the rise again. But as long as I have a story to tell, I\u2019ll always have a set of ears that\u2019ll listen. I can create my works freely, knowing that <em>someone<\/em> out there will get what I\u2019m trying to say, and they\u2019ll enjoy consuming them as much as I enjoyed producing them.<\/p>\n<p>And, after all\u2026 it\u2019s not exactly in my nature to quit.<\/p>\n            <\/div>\r\n    \r\n            <div post_id=\"609\" itemcount=\"2\"  header_id=\"header-1759863925132\" id=\"header-1759863925132\" style=\"\" class=\"accordions-head head1759863925132 border-none\" toggle-text=\"\" main-text=\"&quot;Romantic Infatuation&quot; by Wilfred Kounde \u201828\">\r\n                                    <span id=\"accordion-icons-1759863925132\" class=\"accordion-icons\">\r\n                        <span class=\"accordion-icon-active accordion-plus\"><i class=\"fas fa-chevron-up\"><\/i><\/span>\r\n                        <span class=\"accordion-icon-inactive accordion-minus\"><i class=\"fas fa-chevron-right\"><\/i><\/span>\r\n                    <\/span>\r\n                    <span id=\"header-text-1759863925132\" class=\"accordions-head-title\">\"Romantic Infatuation\" by Wilfred Kounde \u201828<\/span>\r\n                            <\/div>\r\n            <div class=\"accordion-content content1759863925132 \">\r\n                <p>The possibility<br \/>\nAs opposed to the reality<br \/>\nA love one can hold for someone<br \/>\nSomeone they view in such a high regard<br \/>\nIt\u2019s unfortunate, yet beautiful<br \/>\nTo realize that you messed up and be aware of it<br \/>\nAre you going to use that beauty of awareness to improve<br \/>\nOr dwell and let it simmer in your being<br \/>\nA question most ask but don\u2019t dwell on<\/p>\n            <\/div>\r\n    <\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n            <\/div>\n<hr \/>\n<h2 id=\"mast\">Latest News<\/h2>\n<p>11\/13\/25: We&#8217;re proud to share the winners of <em>The Pavan&#8217;s<\/em> recent Nostalgia Writing Contest. Congrats to Nelly, Anushka, Jenaya and Elijah<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/11\/Asking-Permission.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Asking Permission<\/em><\/a> by Nelly Thiman<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/11\/Tamasar-Story-v2.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Tamasar Story<\/em><\/a> by Anushka Tamasar<\/p>\n<p><em><a href=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/11\/Will-You-Still-Love-Me_.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Will You Still Love Me<\/a><\/em> by Jenaya Cruz<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/11\/Wisps-of-the-Past.pdf\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Wisps of the Past<\/em><\/a> by Elijah Beckles<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<h2 id=\"mast\">Follow <em>The Pavan<\/em> and Submit Your Work<\/h2>\n<p>Interested in submitting your work to <em>The Pavan<\/em>? Email us at <a href=\"mailto:pavan@saintpeters.edu\">pavan@saintpeters.edu<\/a> for consideration.<\/p>\n<p>Make sure to follow <em>The Pavan<\/em> on social media!<\/p>\n<table>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/spupavan\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram-150x150.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-623 size-thumbnail\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram-248x248.png 248w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram-392x392.png 392w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram-500x500.png 500w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram-120x120.png 120w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/instagram.png 512w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 150px) 100vw, 150px\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<td><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/spupavan\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/10\/facebook.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"150\" height=\"150\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-623 size-thumbnail\" \/><\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<h2 id=\"mast\">Masthead<\/h2>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Alexander-S-e1758221359378-255x248.jpg\" alt=\"photo of Alexander Martinez Sanchez\" width=\"230\" height=\"224\" class=\" wp-image-594 alignleft\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Alexander-S-e1758221359378-255x248.jpg 255w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Alexander-S-e1758221359378-403x392.jpg 403w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Alexander-S-e1758221359378-150x146.jpg 150w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Alexander-S-e1758221359378-120x117.jpg 120w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Alexander-S-e1758221359378.jpg 720w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 230px) 100vw, 230px\" \/>Alexander Martinez Sanchez is a first-generation Mexican-American and a junior at Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter\u2019s University, pursuing a rigorous course of study that includes double majoring in Political Science and Philosophy, with minors in Criminal Justice, Social Justice, and Theology. As a student representative of the Honors Program, he challenged himself this semester by enrolling in seven courses, including an internship with a potential city councilman, which provided him with firsthand experience in grassroots politics and community engagement. During the Fall 2025 semester, he was honored to receive the Philip Berrigan and Daniel Berrigan, S.J. Award for Social Justice, a significant milestone in his dedication to advocacy and service. His academic journey has also taken him abroad to France, Portugal, Belgium, Italy, and the Vatican, broadening his global perspective. On campus, Alexander serves as one of the Editors-in-Chief of the Pavan Literary Magazine. Outside the classroom, he balances his role as a lead dispatcher at Renato\u2019s Pizza Masters, a position he has held since 2021, with his passions for music\u2014playing guitar, piano, and drums\u2014and soccer, both of which continue to fuel his discipline, creativity, and drive for excellence.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769-243x248.jpg\" alt=\"photo of Khalia Solozano\" width=\"230\" height=\"235\" class=\" wp-image-595 alignright\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769-243x248.jpg 243w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769-384x392.jpg 384w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769-147x150.jpg 147w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769-768x784.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769-118x120.jpg 118w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Khalia-S-e1758221317769.jpg 1283w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 230px) 100vw, 230px\" \/>Khalia Solozano is a third-year student at Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter\u2019s University. She is majoring in English and pursuing a minor in Creative Writing and Publishing. Currently, she is the recipient of the <em>Academic Excellence Scholarship<\/em>, the <em>Mark Sullivan Scholarship<\/em>, and the <em>Julie Coleman Annual Scholarship<\/em>. Additionally, she is a member of both, Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter\u2019s University\u2019s Honors Program and <em>Sigma Tau Delta<\/em>, the International English Honor Society. For her superior academic performance in the College of Arts and Sciences, she has earned her name on the Dean\u2019s List and was awarded the <em>Gold Medal of Excellence<\/em> in 2024. Khalia has interests in literature and writing, and some of her work has already been published in The Pavan Art &amp; Literary Magazine.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490-212x248.jpg\" alt=\"photo of Jacob Tecson\" width=\"234\" height=\"274\" class=\" wp-image-596 alignleft\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490-212x248.jpg 212w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490-335x392.jpg 335w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490-128x150.jpg 128w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490-768x898.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490-103x120.jpg 103w, https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/wp-content\/blogs.dir\/27\/files\/2025\/09\/Jacob-T-e1758221435490.jpg 1167w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 234px) 100vw, 234px\" \/>Jacob Tecson is an editor for the Pavan as well as a senior, majoring in Psychology and minoring in Creative Writing and Statistics. For several years he has been interested in fiction writing and devising ideas for creative short stories, as well as the format of magazines and how they are edited. While having a passing interest and participation in the Pavan previously, this is the first year he is directly involved with the internals of how the magazine is run.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Pavan Art and Literary Magazine of Âé¶¹´«Ã½AVPeter&#8217;s, created each year by students and faculty from the English and Art Departments, promotes the ideals of literature by providing students with a recognized means of expression. We welcome submissions of original poetry and prose, as well as visual art, from students, faculty, staff, and alumni [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1293,"featured_media":0,"parent":35,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-583","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/583","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1293"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=583"}],"version-history":[{"count":28,"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/583\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":640,"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/583\/revisions\/640"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/35"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.saintpeters.edu\/academics\/undergraduate-programs\/english\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=583"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}